There are stories which bring joy to us. Those that we may know not to be entirely true but still couldn’t care less. One of my early worries upon finding out that Shrey is deaf was if my hearing and deaf kid would bond together. It’s been a year and the answer is in my face each day. It’s a big and solid YES. My deaf and hearing kids are like any other typical siblings, they fight and laugh and share and cry and play again. I would like to push this just a little further and say that this is how their stars were aligned and it was not meant to be any other way.
May was about two and a half at the time we started to learn sign language. Sometimes she would goof around and make-up her own signs. During one of those playful moments she made-up a name sign for Shrey which is a real sign for ‘friend’ in ASL. The sign is made using both hands in X-handshape, the hooks of both hands connect, dominant hand on top, then turn over and connect again. Think of the entwined lives of friends. Yes, my child for sure. You were spot on.
May 9, 2022, my daughter, May, turned 3. It is also the only day in the year that I did not see her. The day my son, Shrey had bilateral cochlear implant surgery. After a period of uncertainty and delay due to the nurses strike (which hadn’t happened in some 20 odd years, as if there wasn’t enough insanity going on in our lives), we were keen to find a rescheduled date for the surgery. What the strike also meant was overflowing operating rooms and an understaffed hospital. The only day available anytime soon was May’s 3rd birthday. I was nervous, scared and anxious about the surgery and did not want to associate those feelings with her birthday. But in an alternate world of thoughts I convinced myself that it was a conspired way for the two of my kids to share their connection. Nothing could or would go wrong with such a force behind them.
Shrey is now 3 days shy of his 15 month birthday. He has about 30 expressive signs (these days he comes up with new signs each day). Speech wise he is babbling a lot, has many consonants and vowels. Feeding fodder to my wishful imagination, the first word that he is almost saying is ‘e e’ for ‘didi’ meaning big sister in hindi. I do not think it could have played out any other way.
So yes, my deaf and hearing kids are bonding and if you ask me it is more along the lines of transcendent than real.